Time before I leave at home...

An uneasy feeling always grows on me while I am packing to go on a trip. This trip to Thailand requires many unique things, such as ‘write in rain’ water proof paper, NRS Kickers, (they’re like those goofy watershoes that were cool for 5 minutes in 3rd grade that everyone wore to the pool) and other random 'expedition' gear. Now it is my experience that on an expedition, the success rate of a trip is ninety percent sheer luck and the rest relies on planning. But the smallest fraction of a percent is in some way related to your gear. However, even in this case it is most likely because you have too much gear to deal with. So in gathering gear, I have opted to not buy many things that are on the list of necessities. Besides, a wise man once told me, bring half the gear, and twice the money.

Speaking of the money, there is nothing more uneasy or trying than to make money before a trip. Mainly because no matter how much money you can make, there is about a 90% chance that you will need more. There is also a 90% chance that you will not be able to get any more before you leave. Thus being the case, my financial accounting is banking on the hope that the living expenses in Thailand will be about 1/100th of what they are in the United States. I have also started looking for valuable items around the house that I can sell. Unfortunately, although I have tried endlessly to persuade my little sister, our yellow Labrador is NOT for sale (But if you make an offer, they might not miss her.)- true story

It is a peculiar thing living back at home. There is clear distinction between visiting home, and living at home. Visiting home after you’ve gone and lived on your own is all the best things home life can offer. Fresh made cookies, warm family hugs, food in the refrigerator (Still a miracle for a college student), reminiscing childhood stories, and maybe if you’re lucky, mom might just do the dirty laundry in your bag. It is also great to see old friends and talk about the ‘glory’ days of high school pranks and fun times. For a while, it might even be fun to do family dishes together again. However, that reminiscent shine fades faster than bubblicious flavor. For a while it is great to work together, but those fond memories become chores again and you remember how ready you were to leave the house senior year. It takes about one week to realize that that lovely woman who tenderly cared for you through your childhood is just your mom. And when those rosy colored glasses come off, she wants you to clean your room and take care of the dog and do the dishes and don’t do it that way, but use this and don’t organize that and this goes here.. and thus it begans. Even the time with your old friends can become stale when you realize that they are completely different. There is the guy who graduated and went on to some college, but hasn’t quite gotten out of high school yet. Which is fun for the New Years party but I just don’t think I can pretend to laugh at another ignorant joke. There is also the friend who has gone the opposite direction as you. If you become a tax attorney, she becomes a child caseworker and wants to run a foster home. You’re a Obama, he’s a McCain. You wonder how you ever managed to live at home at all. And in an instant, you want to leave more than anything else. It is just that instant and I have three weeks left before I leave.

I am so ready to leave… If only I had enough money.